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Learning Patience
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you realise that you cannot have everything that you want right now you will be less angry. Impatience for something to happen that you badly want can lead to anger. By accepting that you have to have patience for some things to happen you can relax and not feel aggression and anger surge up inside you. While you are waiting for something go for an aromatherapy session or listen to good music or keep your mind occupied with a good book. How will I know that someone in my company is losing his or her temper? Most people will raise their voices and begin to shake their fists or wave their arms about. They might stop talking and leave the room slamming the door behind them. They could become very quiet and stop talking to you altogether. Which ever way things go it is advisable to leave the room yourself and save yourself from having to be a witness to a temper tantrum. This could well defuse the situation before it gets ugly. This person will be the one to get road rage. He will scream at other drivers on the road calling them names and cursing them. This will be due to the fact that he wants to be in control of what is happening everywhere in his environment. If people do not act the way he or she wants them to he will verbally abuse them. Fear is often the underlying emotion that triggers off anger. The fear of losing control of a situation might reveal your lack of self confidence so you fly off in a rage and use your anger to disguise the true you. It might be your way of trying to win an argument. If you become abusive then the other party will probably back down and you will feel like the winner. You might have been a victim of anger attacks as a child. This probably made you very fearful and now as an adult the only way you have of handling any argumentative of confrontational situation is by displaying your anger in order to disguise your fear. By giving yourself over to uncontrollable anger you think you can hide your fear from everyone. The fact is that any confrontation brings out fear in you and will do so until you address the fear. No one can do this for you. You will have to face the fears that are in you and address them one by one. Probably none of them will even be valid anymore now that you are an adult and are no longer subjected to the anger of someone from your childhood. Once in the light you will realise that you have nothing to fear and will not find it necessary to have temper tantrums to prove anything to anyone. Stand in front of a mirror and tell yourself that you have nothing to fear and that by being an angry person you are not achieving anything. You are only alienating yourself from the people you love and that love you. By: BRENDA VAN NIEKERK |
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